Breaking Boundaries: Lessons they never taught

Being masculine doesn’t mean you have to be toxic in a masculine way. It means embracing inner masculinity to get where your inner potential wants you to be in life.

These are the lessons I learned as a man that no institute will teach you but these lessons will help battle the lowest of the lowest times.

 

Accepting failure

Since childhood, we are told not to cry, and eventually, when we grow up, our worth is decided by our success. When you start your professional career, you are treated based on what you have achieved.

When I was 11, I was training in judo, and I used to win all the Judo competitions in my school. But I finished seventh out of seven kids in an interschool competition. My inner male ego felt insulted in me. At that time, my mom and my judo coach gave me harsh treatment and said if you have lost, your result is not in my hand, but your preparation is, and you didn’t practice hard enough.

I practiced hard over the following year, and from age 12-15, I won a gold medal every year in an interschool competition. 

When my career started on YouTube, everyone was judging, but I knew it was a recap of age 11 where I had to get better.

My parents had made one thing clear to me that they will provide a roof over my head but will not support me financially after college. So I started training people. I used to travel from Dadar to Andheri and on the days those clients didn’t feel like working out, I used to go to Juhu and used to ask people who were running or exercising to subscribe to my YouTube channel.

The most important lesson you learn is failure will help you grow beyond what you know.

Rejection

One of the important emotional hacks that no video or school can teach is how to deal with rejection from women. In life, you need to learn to accept rejection. 

When I started YouTube, the first year was challenging, but I gained around 30-40 thousand subscribers, which was a huge number back then. The only thing that helped me achieve that was going all in. It was all about putting in all the effort.

I started dating at that time. I was a hardcore nonvegetarian, and the girl I was dating was a Jain. We were going out, and I opened myself to her. One day she came and said she didn’t feel things would work out. And my reaction was I would make it work. I kept calling her and pursuing her. At that time, one of my friends told me I must let it go and stop obsessing. I was mad at him.

Later I understood he was right. At times you are not meant to be with someone. You don’t need to pursue anyone. Work on yourself because if the flower blooms well, the bees will come to the flower.

Learn From Women

When you ask women questions related to emotions, they will give you better advice. Girls exchange a lot of emotions. They are more expressive and analyze often. They grow faster because they communicate. And this is what a friendship with women will teach you. 

Girls know that love is the answer. I suggest having more platonic friendships with women.

Discomfort For Growth

I have quoted this line always from Joe Rogan, “Soft men create hard times. Hard times create hard men. Hard men create soft times”, and the cycle continues.

When you grow up with difficulties, you become a different human in your 20s and 30s. You have an edge. You have to put yourself through the grind. Every guy has an inherent warrior. It is all about putting that warrior in a difficult situation.

Exercise for the Brain

When you get truly into Martial Arts, you will know it’s not just about cool moves but also has a spiritual side. It is about training your mind and living life in a particular way.

I started intermittent fasting. At the start, it is difficult. But it helps a lot for your hormonal system and the healing mechanism. 

As exercise is important to keep your body healthy similarly, meditation is crucial for your mind.

There are days when I don’t want to meditate, but I force myself. And after sitting for that meditation, I am still. Meditation gives you a stillness.

The pain is inevitable. Life will throw challenges at you. Life will become earlier when you learn pain is a part of life and

you have to process it. Prepare yourself for the pain. Learn to process it by meditation, journaling, or therapy, whatever works for you. Learn to love with detachment so that when tough times come you are ready to face it.

Thank You!